JMJ. Ever since it became important to me, ie. soon after my conversion to Catholicism, I have wanted to be a disciple of Jesus'. I haven't been a very good one, I admit. Whatever small success I've achieved has been through the grace of God and certainly in spite of anything I've done. Still, that has been my aim--and a good one, an admrable goal to have.
But I was listening to a CD not long ago--which, I misremember. The speaker mentioned the concept of discipline and how necessary it is in order to follow Christ faithfully. Such as in fasting. You know--givng something up. I've never been great at that because I'm too focused on my material wants. Give up ice cream for a bed-time snack? Get real!
Now, being a disciple--I could shoot for that. I'm a great follower but a poor leader. I can follow with the best of them. But discipline? Discipline is the ability to control one's self. Discipline is self-mastery. What's odd is that they both come from the same root. It was one of those mini epiphanies I've had from time to time. If I ever want to follow Christ properly I need to master myself. That's gonna take some real work. But knowing the problem and it's solution is half the battle. Now for the hard part...
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Monday, March 21, 2011
"New Speech"
JMJ. I hate the new speech of a generation almost completely out of contact with the Real. Specifically, the phrase "my bad." The kids use it to excuse themselves when they've made a mistake. But, like society in general, they in particular don't want to accept responsibility and do NOT want to say, "I'm sorry, I made a mistake. Please forgive me." Instead, it's "my bad." God help us.
"Lenten Thoughts"
JMJ. Ok, I'm going to repeat some things I've written of earlier. I'm 63 so my mind isn't what it once was and it's my blog so I can do as I please. So there.
The last couple of years I've taken to using only the Sorrowful Mysteries during Lent when I pray the Rosary. It just seems to be the right thing to do. After all, though Lent's outcome is Easter, the period itself is not what you would call joyful or luminous or glorious. It's sombre and that's the way I feel like praying it.
I've also started doing something else this year during my Rosary. Following the "amen" of each "Hail Mary" I add "mea culpa, Domine." If He could undergo such a frightful Passion on my account it seems only fitting that I continually acknowledge my sinfulness which caused that Passion.
Finally, there is one bright spot amongst the grey. Although it was MY sin that caused Him to sweat blood in the garden, and it was I who wielded the scourge that bloodied His back, and they were MY hands that wove the plait of thorns which pierced His brow, and it was MY hand which pounded the nails which gave us the first crucifix, it was I who helped Him carry His cross through St. simon of Cyrene. Thank you, Lord, for this small penance.
The last couple of years I've taken to using only the Sorrowful Mysteries during Lent when I pray the Rosary. It just seems to be the right thing to do. After all, though Lent's outcome is Easter, the period itself is not what you would call joyful or luminous or glorious. It's sombre and that's the way I feel like praying it.
I've also started doing something else this year during my Rosary. Following the "amen" of each "Hail Mary" I add "mea culpa, Domine." If He could undergo such a frightful Passion on my account it seems only fitting that I continually acknowledge my sinfulness which caused that Passion.
Finally, there is one bright spot amongst the grey. Although it was MY sin that caused Him to sweat blood in the garden, and it was I who wielded the scourge that bloodied His back, and they were MY hands that wove the plait of thorns which pierced His brow, and it was MY hand which pounded the nails which gave us the first crucifix, it was I who helped Him carry His cross through St. simon of Cyrene. Thank you, Lord, for this small penance.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
"God's Mysterious Ways"
JMJ. One would have had to have had his head buried in the sand for the last few weeks not to have noticed the horrible devastation in Japan as the result of a Richter 9 earthquake and its subsequent tsunami. Even the hardest of heart would have been hard-pressed not to have been moved by the suffering of the Japanese people.
Well, I'm not particularly hard-hearted so I was very troubled at this devastation and misery. On a very peronal level, too, since--as I've mentioned before--we once had a Japanese exchange student living with us for a year when my sisters were in high school. You can imagine that I was quite worried about her and her family's safety so I e-mailed that evening and was vastly relieved when she quickly replied that she, the family, and her home were safe but that they had lost many of their possessions.
The material can be replaced but imagine my surprise when I received a note from a woman unknown to me saying that she had gone to school with Toko (and my sisters, of course) so many years ago and that they had not been in contact for quite some time. Had I heard anything from her and could I put her in touch with Toko? Now how, I wondered had this woman thought to write me? I read further and it happens that upon hearing of the earthquake she googled Toko's name and my previous blog page came up!
Of course I replied that I had, indeed, just heard from Toko and that she was well. I offered to forward a message to her if she wished. She did, she wrote, and I forwarded it. Toko was so thankful to have heard from another of her old friends. She might have been surprised at this coincidence but I wasn't--after all, I believe in the communion of the saints. God's got us all safe in His arms and He's got a plan for all of us. Amen.
Well, I'm not particularly hard-hearted so I was very troubled at this devastation and misery. On a very peronal level, too, since--as I've mentioned before--we once had a Japanese exchange student living with us for a year when my sisters were in high school. You can imagine that I was quite worried about her and her family's safety so I e-mailed that evening and was vastly relieved when she quickly replied that she, the family, and her home were safe but that they had lost many of their possessions.
The material can be replaced but imagine my surprise when I received a note from a woman unknown to me saying that she had gone to school with Toko (and my sisters, of course) so many years ago and that they had not been in contact for quite some time. Had I heard anything from her and could I put her in touch with Toko? Now how, I wondered had this woman thought to write me? I read further and it happens that upon hearing of the earthquake she googled Toko's name and my previous blog page came up!
Of course I replied that I had, indeed, just heard from Toko and that she was well. I offered to forward a message to her if she wished. She did, she wrote, and I forwarded it. Toko was so thankful to have heard from another of her old friends. She might have been surprised at this coincidence but I wasn't--after all, I believe in the communion of the saints. God's got us all safe in His arms and He's got a plan for all of us. Amen.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
"The New Centurions"
JMJ. It should come as no surprise that I'm reading another book which was recommended to me by my dear friend, Jan. It's called unPlanned, by Abby Johnson. I'm only halfway through it but I knew right off the bat that I'd have to pass on this review to others. It's dynamite--the story of a young woman who came out from the shadows of a career with Planned Parenthood in the abortion industry into the bright light of the pro-life movement.
To say the least, this is at the same time both a harrowing and joyous account of one woman's road to Damascus. My own road was no less sinful but not nearly as dramatic. I began working in the operating room as a registered nurse in 1974. Our hospital at the time did abortions on a regular basis. I was one of the few nurses who would help. Not only was I not pro-life, I'm not sure if I was even Christian. Through the grace of God (I can admit that now) my shadows were not nearly as intense and not as long-lived as Abby Johnson's.
One of the most controversial topics in the abortion debate at the time was what constituted life. Was a fetus in possession of a soul and thus worthy of protection or not? The pro-abortion folks said no and of course the pro-life folks said yes. I said, "I don't really know." But my nurse's training said that if in doubt, err on the side the angels. That is, if one isn't sure if something is contaminated, assume that it is and start over. If one doesn't know if a piece of equipment is working properly, assume that it is not and find a good one.
Since I didn't know if a fetus was fully human and possessed of a soul I had to assume that it was and therefore act for his or her protection. I quit assisting with abortions. I wasn't knocked off my horse like St. Paul was. I kind of slipped off, not with a blinding flash but more a dull "thunk." I'm not yet to the point in the book where Abby Johnson leaves Planned Parenthood but I know that she did and that she joined a group called the Society of Centurions. As it states in their credo: "The Centurion who stood at the foot of the cross of Christ suddenly became horrified at the crucifixion he was ordered to carry out. When Christ died, this Centurion dropped his sword and fell to his knees exclaiming, 'Surely, this was an innocent man!'"
I, too, am a centurion. I have confessed and been forgiven but I can never forget the lives I have helped to take. All I can pray is, "Dear children look with mercy on this poor sinner." Amen.
To say the least, this is at the same time both a harrowing and joyous account of one woman's road to Damascus. My own road was no less sinful but not nearly as dramatic. I began working in the operating room as a registered nurse in 1974. Our hospital at the time did abortions on a regular basis. I was one of the few nurses who would help. Not only was I not pro-life, I'm not sure if I was even Christian. Through the grace of God (I can admit that now) my shadows were not nearly as intense and not as long-lived as Abby Johnson's.
One of the most controversial topics in the abortion debate at the time was what constituted life. Was a fetus in possession of a soul and thus worthy of protection or not? The pro-abortion folks said no and of course the pro-life folks said yes. I said, "I don't really know." But my nurse's training said that if in doubt, err on the side the angels. That is, if one isn't sure if something is contaminated, assume that it is and start over. If one doesn't know if a piece of equipment is working properly, assume that it is not and find a good one.
Since I didn't know if a fetus was fully human and possessed of a soul I had to assume that it was and therefore act for his or her protection. I quit assisting with abortions. I wasn't knocked off my horse like St. Paul was. I kind of slipped off, not with a blinding flash but more a dull "thunk." I'm not yet to the point in the book where Abby Johnson leaves Planned Parenthood but I know that she did and that she joined a group called the Society of Centurions. As it states in their credo: "The Centurion who stood at the foot of the cross of Christ suddenly became horrified at the crucifixion he was ordered to carry out. When Christ died, this Centurion dropped his sword and fell to his knees exclaiming, 'Surely, this was an innocent man!'"
I, too, am a centurion. I have confessed and been forgiven but I can never forget the lives I have helped to take. All I can pray is, "Dear children look with mercy on this poor sinner." Amen.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
"Pro-Life--and Proud of It!"
JMJ. The Cleveland "Plain Dealer" is your usual liberal mouth-piece. They've got a token conservative assistant Editor (who's really a very thoughtful and intelligent writer and lightning rod for all the liberal diatribes) and a couple Christians whose theology is awfully iffy. Oh, and a bunch of folks whose secularism is amply apparent. One of the so-called Christians, citing hypocrisy on the part of the Republicans, said that if one were truly pro-life, the death penalty should immediately be repealed. I happen to agree. The Holy Father, Pope John Paul II, has said that though Biblically defensible, the death penalty should be used very rarely, if at all.
The Democrats, though, are hardly the ones to holler "hypocrite" when you consider that in the case of the United States, the number of executions could be numbered in the thousands whereas in the thirty-some years since Roe v. Wade, millions of babies have been aborted each year. What's wrong with this picture? I think it is well past time to drop artificial divisions. It is senseless to proclaim oneself Republican or Democrat. One is either pro-life or pro-death. There is, and can be, no middle ground. Christ said in the Gospels that He would return at the end of time and separate the sheep and the goats, the wheat and the chaff. In reality we are doing it for Him.
The Democrats, though, are hardly the ones to holler "hypocrite" when you consider that in the case of the United States, the number of executions could be numbered in the thousands whereas in the thirty-some years since Roe v. Wade, millions of babies have been aborted each year. What's wrong with this picture? I think it is well past time to drop artificial divisions. It is senseless to proclaim oneself Republican or Democrat. One is either pro-life or pro-death. There is, and can be, no middle ground. Christ said in the Gospels that He would return at the end of time and separate the sheep and the goats, the wheat and the chaff. In reality we are doing it for Him.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
"Somewhere in Time"
JMJ. I admit I have a real problem with time. Not telling time, mind you, but being patient in it. Like the vast majority of Americans, when I want something, I want it NOW! God doesn't work that way. I don't think they have watches in heaven since they run on the Eternal Now Time Zone.
In fairness to me, my impatience has more to do with the salvation of souls than when my next airplane model is affordable. Thankfully, and through the grace of God, I'm not as tied to the material as I once was though Linda might disagree with that. It's hard, though, to look around at our society and see the people who are unwittingly flirting with damnation. It's bad enough to sin knowingly but when one is totally blind spiritually, how is one to know that one's feet dance at the edge of the precipice and that the next false step might be one's last?
That's where my impatience comes in. I know by what a miracle the scales fell from my eyes and I want the same thing for EVERYONE. NOW! Our Lady at Fatima told the three children that souls were being lost to hell every moment of the day. That thought sends shivers down my back. Repeat after me: "Dear Holy Ghost, please open the hearts and minds of all who do not know the Truth of Jesus Christ. Blessed Mother Mary, please whisper in their ears that Christ knocks on the doors of our hearts and wants to bear each of His sheep home to His Heavenly Father. Amen."
In fairness to me, my impatience has more to do with the salvation of souls than when my next airplane model is affordable. Thankfully, and through the grace of God, I'm not as tied to the material as I once was though Linda might disagree with that. It's hard, though, to look around at our society and see the people who are unwittingly flirting with damnation. It's bad enough to sin knowingly but when one is totally blind spiritually, how is one to know that one's feet dance at the edge of the precipice and that the next false step might be one's last?
That's where my impatience comes in. I know by what a miracle the scales fell from my eyes and I want the same thing for EVERYONE. NOW! Our Lady at Fatima told the three children that souls were being lost to hell every moment of the day. That thought sends shivers down my back. Repeat after me: "Dear Holy Ghost, please open the hearts and minds of all who do not know the Truth of Jesus Christ. Blessed Mother Mary, please whisper in their ears that Christ knocks on the doors of our hearts and wants to bear each of His sheep home to His Heavenly Father. Amen."
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